Ok, so my dad was a prankster. He thought it was funny to scare us, like when we were on the roof of the apartment buildings we managed, checking out the roof for leaks or whatever, he would hold us by the ankles over the edge of the roof. Ha Ha. What was really stupid, is we'd ask to accompany him to the roof. Apparently we were slow learners.
I guess he got this quality from his mom, maybe? My aunt, dad's sister Julie, told us a story of how she would go out to the outhouse and my dad would lie in wait and scare her in the dark. So my grandma, Julie & Dad's mom, decided to teach him a lesson. She waited outside in the dark, and when he went by, she scared the dickens out of him.
Anyway, one year the apartment complex owners decided to add a pitched roof over the flat roof of the big building - 2 1/2 stories high (the first floor was half-buried). Dad made Pete go up on the roof to help him check the vents. Dad is on his hands and knees checking a vent, backing up, checking the next vent, etc. Pete discovered a tiny little shelf below the edge of the roof, and thought it would be really funny to get down on that, hide, and holler AAAAAaaaaaaa....... like he was falling off the roof. Dad just about died, but he deserved it.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Pete Discovers the Purpose of Butt Cracks
My brother Pete works with carpet and tile, and so he has glues and adhesives in 5 gallon buckets. One day he was sitting on one of them and didn't realize that the lid had a tiny hole in it. I think he was cleaning shrimp or something. Anyway, later on at home, he was taking a shower and dropped the soap. When he tried to bend over and pick it up, he realized he had glued his "cheeks" together. Apparently butt cracks are necessary for bending and squatting.That story alone is hilarious to our family.
What's funnier to my daughter, Hanna, is the image of Pete's wife Tanya squatting behind him with the bottle of finger nail polish remover and trying to peel his cheeks back apart.
What's funnier to my daughter, Hanna, is the image of Pete's wife Tanya squatting behind him with the bottle of finger nail polish remover and trying to peel his cheeks back apart.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Not the Favorite
(by Kady)
So one day Kasey is accusing my mom that I am the favorite daughter. Here is their conversation. And I'm totally in the same room:Kasey: "Kady is your favorite. You always side with her in every fight. Just admit it. Admit it. Admit Kady is your favorite. ADMIT IT."Mom (screaming): "KADY'S NEVER BEEN MY FAVORITE!!!!!!!"
Posted by kadyhexum at 6:22 PM
6 comments:
kasey said...
I love that you put my part in quotes, like that is EXACTLY what I said, over 5 years ago. either you have a photographic memory or you are taking some artistic liscense.
January 28, 2009 11:50 PM
kasey said...
i forgot to add, Mom: me think thou doth protest too much
January 28, 2009 11:51 PM
anna said...
hahaha, LOL this has me choking it so funny. But I don't really know why. Is it because I'm sitting home alone just finishing a bottle of wine or because I KNOW I was always my mammas favorite girl? Whatev' That is FUNNY.
January 29, 2009 8:22 PM
Kelly said...
What's really funny Anna is your mother LHAO to the fact that you think you are her favorite. Side point, I'm drinking wine now too.
January 29, 2009 9:35 PM
kadyhexum said...
I guess we're all drinking wine now aren't we?
January 29, 2009 11:38 PM
prettiest sister said...
I know Kady has never been mom's favorite, because I am her favorite, and I am not drinking a thing.
So one day Kasey is accusing my mom that I am the favorite daughter. Here is their conversation. And I'm totally in the same room:Kasey: "Kady is your favorite. You always side with her in every fight. Just admit it. Admit it. Admit Kady is your favorite. ADMIT IT."Mom (screaming): "KADY'S NEVER BEEN MY FAVORITE!!!!!!!"
Posted by kadyhexum at 6:22 PM
6 comments:
kasey said...
I love that you put my part in quotes, like that is EXACTLY what I said, over 5 years ago. either you have a photographic memory or you are taking some artistic liscense.
January 28, 2009 11:50 PM
kasey said...
i forgot to add, Mom: me think thou doth protest too much
January 28, 2009 11:51 PM
anna said...
hahaha, LOL this has me choking it so funny. But I don't really know why. Is it because I'm sitting home alone just finishing a bottle of wine or because I KNOW I was always my mammas favorite girl? Whatev' That is FUNNY.
January 29, 2009 8:22 PM
Kelly said...
What's really funny Anna is your mother LHAO to the fact that you think you are her favorite. Side point, I'm drinking wine now too.
January 29, 2009 9:35 PM
kadyhexum said...
I guess we're all drinking wine now aren't we?
January 29, 2009 11:38 PM
prettiest sister said...
I know Kady has never been mom's favorite, because I am her favorite, and I am not drinking a thing.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Miss America
I don't know why this is the first thing I think of "growing up hexum", but it is, so here: Growing up all the boys liked Keri, so it seemed. Not Mike Moran (Msomething?). She and I came out of our townhome, aka apartment. I believe after getting all dolled up cuz we saw him at the swing set. He was the new boy. He starts singing from the swings, "here she comes Miss America" and Keri walks taller and sassier. Mike says "not you". Which left only me. Ahhhhh. I think our love affair lastest all summer until Wendy Van Hale showed up. She had boobs.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Got this email from mom this morning...
OK, so here's the thing...Hal now has his own cell phone.
If you call him, you are at your own mercy. Three things will happen: he will either think he spent his money wisely, or he will think he did not, and it will freak him out every time the thing rings.
Be patient. He wears it on his belt...next to his knife.
P.S. Don't leave him a message yet. He can't do it and I can't teach him everything at once.
He is very confused right now and pretty techno'd out. We also got dish network and he keeps pushing all the wrong buttons. Oh, and me? I get a little irritated, but it is kind of fun.
If you call him, you are at your own mercy. Three things will happen: he will either think he spent his money wisely, or he will think he did not, and it will freak him out every time the thing rings.
Be patient. He wears it on his belt...next to his knife.
P.S. Don't leave him a message yet. He can't do it and I can't teach him everything at once.
He is very confused right now and pretty techno'd out. We also got dish network and he keeps pushing all the wrong buttons. Oh, and me? I get a little irritated, but it is kind of fun.
Monday, April 13, 2009
6 kids
Someone at my dad's company was marvelling the fact that we have six kids in our family. He asked, "How'd you think you were gonna feed all them kids?"
And my dad said, "Well, at the time, I guess I thought I could feed the world."
And my dad said, "Well, at the time, I guess I thought I could feed the world."
Hal Hexum, a pillar of compassion
I am going through old emails and found this one, it's too hilarious. Here is a conversation Keri had with dad about a year ago:
Keri: Is mom home today?
Dad : No she is working.
Keri: Okay, I just called her to tell her something interesting. On wednesday, Marc and I went to Rochestor for his doctor appointment. We were very discouraged, because originally they had said Marc had a chance to live for possibly 10 to 15 years, but his chemo treatment isn' t decreasing his cancer for the last 3 months, so the numbers of 3 to 5 years were starting to come up again, and a stem cell transplant often only increases ones life for 18 months. So we were just sick and scared. But this morning my friend was watching the Today show and Geralidine Ferrara ( former congresswoman) has multiple myeloma, and she was told she had 3 to 5 years to live, but she has tried a new drug, and it is working well, and she feels good. She was diagnosed with the cancer 9 years ago. So I am encouraged by that and wanted to tell mom looking up the article online.
Dad : Well, she will be home by 4pm. Now there is red juice on the top of my steak do you suppose it is to rare and I haven't cooked it long enough?
Keri: Is mom home today?
Dad : No she is working.
Keri: Okay, I just called her to tell her something interesting. On wednesday, Marc and I went to Rochestor for his doctor appointment. We were very discouraged, because originally they had said Marc had a chance to live for possibly 10 to 15 years, but his chemo treatment isn' t decreasing his cancer for the last 3 months, so the numbers of 3 to 5 years were starting to come up again, and a stem cell transplant often only increases ones life for 18 months. So we were just sick and scared. But this morning my friend was watching the Today show and Geralidine Ferrara ( former congresswoman) has multiple myeloma, and she was told she had 3 to 5 years to live, but she has tried a new drug, and it is working well, and she feels good. She was diagnosed with the cancer 9 years ago. So I am encouraged by that and wanted to tell mom looking up the article online.
Dad : Well, she will be home by 4pm. Now there is red juice on the top of my steak do you suppose it is to rare and I haven't cooked it long enough?
Sunday, April 12, 2009
My Issues
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
My Issues
Ok, so I DO have issues. One is that I NEED to be validated. I can't just start a blog and then go about my business without obsessing about whether it's funny enough, or just stupid, etc. I wait on pins and needles to see what kinds of comments are added, and then, that not being good enough, I have to call my two baby sisters (who, I think, are the funniest people I know - especially Kasey, sorry, Kady) and get their opinions.I think that not only are my sisters funny, they are cool, especially Kady, sorry Kasey. I mean, please, she always dresses funky, and she's a world traveler. It's a little humbling to have the little kids, whose diapers you used to change and whose vomit you used to clean up, the little kids you used to teach everything to, etc. now be cooler and funnier than you. Rather than having them look up to me for validation and acceptance, I look to them for those things. The first epiphany I had that I was not in their league, I was no longer young, and I was definitely NOT cool, was the night I was up in the Falls visiting my folks. My sisters had their friends over, and there was a bonfire in the yard. I decided that I was going to go out and join the group of youngsters (and, I thought, my peers) and have fun. I go out, choose a block of wood to sit on, look up, and realize that the conversation had just STOPPED! An old fogey had infiltrated their cool, young group. I quietly just got back up and joined the really old fogeys back in the house.
Posted by Kim at 11:56 AM
6 comments:
kadyhexum said...
p.s. I think you're funny.
November 4, 2008 4:06 PM
Bonnie said...
I think you are funny and quite entertaining...anticipating more from you soon!! lolBonnie
November 5, 2008 6:23 PM
prettiest sister said...
My comment is pending, I have to think about this.
November 7, 2008 12:01 AM
kasey said...
Kady's cool, but she is just a person. She craps her pants one leg at a time, just like we all do.-Ben
November 12, 2008 12:12 AM
Anonymous said...
"we all" meaning you?
November 12, 2008 5:10 PM
kasey said...
yes...me.(whah,whah,whah)-Ben
November 12, 2008 6:14 PM
My Issues
Ok, so I DO have issues. One is that I NEED to be validated. I can't just start a blog and then go about my business without obsessing about whether it's funny enough, or just stupid, etc. I wait on pins and needles to see what kinds of comments are added, and then, that not being good enough, I have to call my two baby sisters (who, I think, are the funniest people I know - especially Kasey, sorry, Kady) and get their opinions.I think that not only are my sisters funny, they are cool, especially Kady, sorry Kasey. I mean, please, she always dresses funky, and she's a world traveler. It's a little humbling to have the little kids, whose diapers you used to change and whose vomit you used to clean up, the little kids you used to teach everything to, etc. now be cooler and funnier than you. Rather than having them look up to me for validation and acceptance, I look to them for those things. The first epiphany I had that I was not in their league, I was no longer young, and I was definitely NOT cool, was the night I was up in the Falls visiting my folks. My sisters had their friends over, and there was a bonfire in the yard. I decided that I was going to go out and join the group of youngsters (and, I thought, my peers) and have fun. I go out, choose a block of wood to sit on, look up, and realize that the conversation had just STOPPED! An old fogey had infiltrated their cool, young group. I quietly just got back up and joined the really old fogeys back in the house.
Posted by Kim at 11:56 AM
6 comments:
kadyhexum said...
p.s. I think you're funny.
November 4, 2008 4:06 PM
Bonnie said...
I think you are funny and quite entertaining...anticipating more from you soon!! lolBonnie
November 5, 2008 6:23 PM
prettiest sister said...
My comment is pending, I have to think about this.
November 7, 2008 12:01 AM
kasey said...
Kady's cool, but she is just a person. She craps her pants one leg at a time, just like we all do.-Ben
November 12, 2008 12:12 AM
Anonymous said...
"we all" meaning you?
November 12, 2008 5:10 PM
kasey said...
yes...me.(whah,whah,whah)-Ben
November 12, 2008 6:14 PM
Now, THAT Would Be a Shock to the System...
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Now, THAT Would Be a Shock to the System...
My dad is funny. I think part of it is that he's a much younger father than most. He was only 19 when I was born, so I didn't really have an old, mature father like most others. I'm really NOT saying that this is a bad thing. It's kind of fun living with a goofy dad. Between the times I was in 1st and 3rd grades, we lived in Silver Lake on a rented farm. By the way, this is what I consider to be the most idyllic time of my childhood. Most good memories I have were from this time period in this house. The house had four bedrooms; three bathrooms; two basements; a school room complete with desks with old inkwells, maps, and a globe; and two kitchens. The orchard had 13 apple trees. The farm had outbuildings, like a pigpen, a duck house, a corn crib, a huge barn with a huge hayloft, a tack room, a large pasture where we had horses, etc., etc., etc. I LOVED living here, and it seemed our family was happiest at this stage of our life.One day, dad was out in the yard, and had to pee really bad. Apparently men don't come to the house when they have to pee; they just find somewhere outside to do it. I don't know if anyone knows what a corn crib looks like, but it's a little building, kind of like a woodshed, made out of slats so the corn can dry, or stay dry. There are two or three (or more) rooms that run from front to back. Between each room is about a two-foot walkway with open framing boards instead of a floor, also running from front to back. Again, this serves to keep the corn dry. The pasture was behind the corn crib, and the electric fencing was attached along the back side of it. Anyway, my dad decided he could go through the opening, or walkway, of the corncrib and pee into the pasture. So he's standing there doing his business, when all of a sudden he looks down, sees that his arc is going over the electric fencing. He realizes that as he slows down and stops what he's doing, his arc is going to turn into a dribble and drop onto the fence. OUCH!! So, now he's pushing hard and hoping not to stop while he ponders this problem as quickly as he can. Finally he comes to a solution, and sticks his hand out, blocking the stream and saving himself quite a shock.
Posted by Kim at 1:07 PM
11 comments:
prettiest sister said...
I loved that house too, it also is some of my fondest memories. Like when we watched the Ozmands and then the Sonny and Cher show every Sunday night and mom had us get in our pajamas and Kim, me and Kelly would lay on the floor watching these wonderful programs, with our long blonde hair, spread out behing us, and Pete would stand on our hair very quietly, waiting for us to stand up, which of course we eventually did. I loved!!!! the Sonny and Cher show. Kim tell the story about Pete and the dog and the little chicks and Dad's truck.
November 7, 2008 12:23 AM
prettiest sister said...
Oh yeah, It was also in that house that I took my first shower instead of a bath, and carefully and patiently taught me how to hold a washcloth over my eyes and lean back into the shower very carefully with my hair only, to rinse out the shampoo and not get water in my eyes.
November 7, 2008 12:26 AM
prettiest sister said...
Sorry I forgot to type in Kim carefully and Patiently taught me.... I wish you could go back and fix your comments, once they are posted.
November 7, 2008 12:31 AM
kadyhexum said...
OMG are you getting mushy on us Keri?
November 7, 2008 12:34 AM
Kelly said...
I have a few memories in that house, the school room, Dad made us a fort out of the snow pile in front of house, it had a bed and fridge, I think. The rooster scared me and I got stuck in one of the buildings, Dad left and I didn't notice so I sat there by myself and couldn't get the courage to leave, lest the rooster eat me alive. Pete falling off the pasture wall. Keri finding a worm in her underwear and screaming bloody murder. Riding Johnny to the end of the road and trying to get him to go on the road/highway whatever it was and she wouldn't do it and I wasn't suppose to anyway.
November 7, 2008 2:34 PM
kadyhexum said...
Sounds like all the fun stuff in our family happened before my arrival.
November 7, 2008 3:10 PM
kasey said...
It was all downhill from there. Kady and Kasey took all the love Mom and Dad had and turned it into stress and bills and too many kids you just wanted to stomp them.
November 10, 2008 2:02 PM
prettiest sister said...
Yep pretty much.
November 14, 2008 11:38 AM
mom said...
Pete never fell off the wall. He just hung there by his fingers while we were listening to his little "hayope". we searched and couldn't find him. He said "hayope" again when your dad was standing right there...he looked down and there he was.
November 18, 2008 10:23 AM
mom said...
And that was the same rooster that always chased Pete. He would be playing out there with his diaper just shredded from that thing clawing at him.
November 18, 2008 10:26 AM
mom said...
As a 25 year old mother, of course you can imaging my reaction to a worm in Keri's underpants!!!!!! I wrapped it in a paper towel and took her to the doctor and spent a hellish time waiting while the doctor searched the encyclopedias for a picture of the worm to find out what it was so he could prescribe the right medication. It ended up being a pig worm, the kids were playing in the sand in front of the pig barn. WE ALL HAD TO DE-WORMED.
November 18, 2008 10:34 AM
Now, THAT Would Be a Shock to the System...
My dad is funny. I think part of it is that he's a much younger father than most. He was only 19 when I was born, so I didn't really have an old, mature father like most others. I'm really NOT saying that this is a bad thing. It's kind of fun living with a goofy dad. Between the times I was in 1st and 3rd grades, we lived in Silver Lake on a rented farm. By the way, this is what I consider to be the most idyllic time of my childhood. Most good memories I have were from this time period in this house. The house had four bedrooms; three bathrooms; two basements; a school room complete with desks with old inkwells, maps, and a globe; and two kitchens. The orchard had 13 apple trees. The farm had outbuildings, like a pigpen, a duck house, a corn crib, a huge barn with a huge hayloft, a tack room, a large pasture where we had horses, etc., etc., etc. I LOVED living here, and it seemed our family was happiest at this stage of our life.One day, dad was out in the yard, and had to pee really bad. Apparently men don't come to the house when they have to pee; they just find somewhere outside to do it. I don't know if anyone knows what a corn crib looks like, but it's a little building, kind of like a woodshed, made out of slats so the corn can dry, or stay dry. There are two or three (or more) rooms that run from front to back. Between each room is about a two-foot walkway with open framing boards instead of a floor, also running from front to back. Again, this serves to keep the corn dry. The pasture was behind the corn crib, and the electric fencing was attached along the back side of it. Anyway, my dad decided he could go through the opening, or walkway, of the corncrib and pee into the pasture. So he's standing there doing his business, when all of a sudden he looks down, sees that his arc is going over the electric fencing. He realizes that as he slows down and stops what he's doing, his arc is going to turn into a dribble and drop onto the fence. OUCH!! So, now he's pushing hard and hoping not to stop while he ponders this problem as quickly as he can. Finally he comes to a solution, and sticks his hand out, blocking the stream and saving himself quite a shock.
Posted by Kim at 1:07 PM
11 comments:
prettiest sister said...
I loved that house too, it also is some of my fondest memories. Like when we watched the Ozmands and then the Sonny and Cher show every Sunday night and mom had us get in our pajamas and Kim, me and Kelly would lay on the floor watching these wonderful programs, with our long blonde hair, spread out behing us, and Pete would stand on our hair very quietly, waiting for us to stand up, which of course we eventually did. I loved!!!! the Sonny and Cher show. Kim tell the story about Pete and the dog and the little chicks and Dad's truck.
November 7, 2008 12:23 AM
prettiest sister said...
Oh yeah, It was also in that house that I took my first shower instead of a bath, and carefully and patiently taught me how to hold a washcloth over my eyes and lean back into the shower very carefully with my hair only, to rinse out the shampoo and not get water in my eyes.
November 7, 2008 12:26 AM
prettiest sister said...
Sorry I forgot to type in Kim carefully and Patiently taught me.... I wish you could go back and fix your comments, once they are posted.
November 7, 2008 12:31 AM
kadyhexum said...
OMG are you getting mushy on us Keri?
November 7, 2008 12:34 AM
Kelly said...
I have a few memories in that house, the school room, Dad made us a fort out of the snow pile in front of house, it had a bed and fridge, I think. The rooster scared me and I got stuck in one of the buildings, Dad left and I didn't notice so I sat there by myself and couldn't get the courage to leave, lest the rooster eat me alive. Pete falling off the pasture wall. Keri finding a worm in her underwear and screaming bloody murder. Riding Johnny to the end of the road and trying to get him to go on the road/highway whatever it was and she wouldn't do it and I wasn't suppose to anyway.
November 7, 2008 2:34 PM
kadyhexum said...
Sounds like all the fun stuff in our family happened before my arrival.
November 7, 2008 3:10 PM
kasey said...
It was all downhill from there. Kady and Kasey took all the love Mom and Dad had and turned it into stress and bills and too many kids you just wanted to stomp them.
November 10, 2008 2:02 PM
prettiest sister said...
Yep pretty much.
November 14, 2008 11:38 AM
mom said...
Pete never fell off the wall. He just hung there by his fingers while we were listening to his little "hayope". we searched and couldn't find him. He said "hayope" again when your dad was standing right there...he looked down and there he was.
November 18, 2008 10:23 AM
mom said...
And that was the same rooster that always chased Pete. He would be playing out there with his diaper just shredded from that thing clawing at him.
November 18, 2008 10:26 AM
mom said...
As a 25 year old mother, of course you can imaging my reaction to a worm in Keri's underpants!!!!!! I wrapped it in a paper towel and took her to the doctor and spent a hellish time waiting while the doctor searched the encyclopedias for a picture of the worm to find out what it was so he could prescribe the right medication. It ended up being a pig worm, the kids were playing in the sand in front of the pig barn. WE ALL HAD TO DE-WORMED.
November 18, 2008 10:34 AM
Meeting Old Friends
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Meeting old friends
Several years ago, when my daughter was about 5 and her brother about 6 years old, we were in Rice Lake, Wisconsin, for my husband's family reunion. We went out to the Chinese Buffet (they must have them in every town) to have supper. When we walked in I spied old family friends I had known since I was a little girl. I knew them individually before they were married. When they finished their meal, they came and joined us at our table to visit awhile. They kept commenting on how quiet and polite my children were and how they couldn't believe they were related to Hexums. They sure didn't act like Hexums....After several minutes of visiting and proud-mother-making comments, Hanna shattered the illusion by standing up on her chair. She put her butt right in her brother's face and let the loudest, longest you-know-what, that I'd ever heard her let and then sat back down and resumed eating. The family friends guffawed loudly and said, "They ARE yours!"
Posted by Kim at 11:17 PM
2 comments:
Kelly said...
Who was it? Karley did the same thing on our first family dinner, except the butt was directed towards me.
November 5, 2008 1:43 PM
Kim said...
Madsens
November 5, 2008 4:53 PM
Meeting old friends
Several years ago, when my daughter was about 5 and her brother about 6 years old, we were in Rice Lake, Wisconsin, for my husband's family reunion. We went out to the Chinese Buffet (they must have them in every town) to have supper. When we walked in I spied old family friends I had known since I was a little girl. I knew them individually before they were married. When they finished their meal, they came and joined us at our table to visit awhile. They kept commenting on how quiet and polite my children were and how they couldn't believe they were related to Hexums. They sure didn't act like Hexums....After several minutes of visiting and proud-mother-making comments, Hanna shattered the illusion by standing up on her chair. She put her butt right in her brother's face and let the loudest, longest you-know-what, that I'd ever heard her let and then sat back down and resumed eating. The family friends guffawed loudly and said, "They ARE yours!"
Posted by Kim at 11:17 PM
2 comments:
Kelly said...
Who was it? Karley did the same thing on our first family dinner, except the butt was directed towards me.
November 5, 2008 1:43 PM
Kim said...
Madsens
November 5, 2008 4:53 PM
Bodily Functions
The majority of my siblings enjoy, and are in tune with, our bodily functions. One day, I had a really great belch coming, and I expelled it right in my daughter's face. I was really proud of myself. However, another mother, witnessing this, was appalled and thought it was disgusting! That appalled ME! What good, self-respecting mother would miss this opportunity? Why would anyone waste it with a silence, a covered mouth, and an "excuse me"? Where is your pride? My dad appreciated his bodily functions, and shared the joy with us. We all envied whoever was the latest "chosen one" who was allowed to pull his finger when the need arose.
9 comments:
kasey said...
Some of the first words my children spoke were "fart". In Miles' case it was "a farting".
November 2, 2008 12:14 PM
kadyhexum said...
Once, Miles farted a million times fast in a row. After I was like, "wow, pretty impressive", he said, "I made the fart have babies."
November 2, 2008 10:47 PM
Kelly said...
We were excited to be chosen to pull his finger?
November 5, 2008 1:50 PM
Kim said...
When we were little. It wore off later, of course! The smell never did, though.
November 5, 2008 4:54 PM
kadyhexum said...
I remember sitting around the table and suddenly dad would say "SHHHH!". And then everybody would pay attention, like in case a wolf would howl outside or something, and then dad would lean and fart.
November 6, 2008 10:25 AM
prettiest sister said...
I think I must have been adopted --because somehow I just don't share in your enjoyment of these bodily functions. It might also be why I don't ever feel compelled to jump of ski lifts or or drive my car into something.
November 6, 2008 11:37 PM
Kim said...
I love the story about when Mom and Dad were first married. Dad pretended that he heard a prowler and stuck his head under the covers; so, of course, mom did, too. Pretty soon, in disgust she muttered, "HAL!"By the way, Keri, I don't feel compelled to jump off ski lifts or drive my car into anything, either. However, there was a time about 20 years ago I used to fantasize about jumping out of the car while we were driving down the highway. Go figure. I think I need to add a whole new section under "Issues."
November 7, 2008 12:25 AM
kasey said...
Kady, you forgot to add the listen part. He would say, "Sh! Listen!" Then he would fart.
November 7, 2008 11:06 AM
mom said...
Nuts, you're all nuts.
November 18, 2008 9:37 AM
9 comments:
kasey said...
Some of the first words my children spoke were "fart". In Miles' case it was "a farting".
November 2, 2008 12:14 PM
kadyhexum said...
Once, Miles farted a million times fast in a row. After I was like, "wow, pretty impressive", he said, "I made the fart have babies."
November 2, 2008 10:47 PM
Kelly said...
We were excited to be chosen to pull his finger?
November 5, 2008 1:50 PM
Kim said...
When we were little. It wore off later, of course! The smell never did, though.
November 5, 2008 4:54 PM
kadyhexum said...
I remember sitting around the table and suddenly dad would say "SHHHH!". And then everybody would pay attention, like in case a wolf would howl outside or something, and then dad would lean and fart.
November 6, 2008 10:25 AM
prettiest sister said...
I think I must have been adopted --because somehow I just don't share in your enjoyment of these bodily functions. It might also be why I don't ever feel compelled to jump of ski lifts or or drive my car into something.
November 6, 2008 11:37 PM
Kim said...
I love the story about when Mom and Dad were first married. Dad pretended that he heard a prowler and stuck his head under the covers; so, of course, mom did, too. Pretty soon, in disgust she muttered, "HAL!"By the way, Keri, I don't feel compelled to jump off ski lifts or drive my car into anything, either. However, there was a time about 20 years ago I used to fantasize about jumping out of the car while we were driving down the highway. Go figure. I think I need to add a whole new section under "Issues."
November 7, 2008 12:25 AM
kasey said...
Kady, you forgot to add the listen part. He would say, "Sh! Listen!" Then he would fart.
November 7, 2008 11:06 AM
mom said...
Nuts, you're all nuts.
November 18, 2008 9:37 AM
Issues
The thing about growing up Hexum is my siblings and I have issues, or "quirks," if you will. I don't know why we have them or where we got them, but we have them. Maybe members of other families also have them. But we like to think we're unique, for whatever reason. When I talk about issues, or "quirks," I mean that my baby sister actually thinks that when she's driving down the road, it just might be possible that gravity is going to just quit working one day and she's going to go off in her car, flying through space. This was the most ridiculous and far-fetched thing I had ever heard anyone having a paranoia about. What's even more "quirky" and weird, is that another of my sisters, months later, mentioned the exact same phobia. WHO THINKS THIS WAY???? Then there's Kady (whose quirks I sometimes share) who feels the need to make herself a public spectacle or laughingstock. Only the problem is, people rarely laugh. Like the time in England when we got off the train at night. In the last car was an older man who, it appeared, was just returning home from a posh London job. He was the kind of man, or gent, who should be wearing a top hat, spats, and a monocle. Kady decides to do one of the "I'm off to the big war, wait for me, sweetheart, I love you" type of scenes where she runs after the train with a raised hand and waves as if she'll never see him again. Does the guy react? NOPE! (For more examples of Kady's issues, please tune in to http://www.kadyhexum.blogspot.com/. Especially, the "Elevators" post.) Keri - she'll wait inside a public bathroom for someone to enter, so she can leave when she's finished, if the door is an in-swing style door, and there are no paper towels with which to touch the door handle. Not that I feel this is totally weird. One of my proudest moments as a mother was the day I took my children to the Split Rock Lighthouse on the North Shore and allowed Skeeter to use the men's bathroom by himself. I'm in the gift shop enjoying looking at all the tourist stuff I would never buy, and I hear a muted, "MOM!" coming from inside the men's bathroom. Thinking he may be in some sort of trouble, I opened the door to hear, "Thanks, mom. There weren't any paper towels, so I couldn't open the door to get out." I love it. My quirks: Are you kidding? I don't have any.
7 comments:
kasey said...
I'm sorry, but I feel this fear of gravity stopping is completely legit. At least I am not afraid of balloons, like my sister in law Shene, ridiculous.
November 2, 2008 12:15 PM
Kelly said...
I gave the fear of losing gravity to Kasey, Sorry its one of my biggest. I actually hope that when it happens, I'm in my home, so that I don't float away into space. Another fear: while skiing I fear that I will just randomly jump off the lift. Sometimes I wrap my arm around the back of seat, just in case it happens.
November 5, 2008 1:57 PM
Kim said...
Your rational self won't stop you from just jumping off the lift? You'll just happen to be over some wide open space, and you'll think to yourself, hmmmm, I think I'll jump! ??
November 5, 2008 4:56 PM
kadyhexum said...
Sometimes I have a fear that while driving down the highway at breakneck speeds, I will purposely drive into a tree. I have to stop myself from doing it.Or in a plane I fear that I might try to break the window near my seat.
November 6, 2008 10:28 AM
Hanna said...
I think the jumping off a ski lift thing is rational. I have the same thing. Most of the way up I just imagine what would happen when I hit the ground, would I land perfectly and ski all the way down the hill backwards? Or would I land and instantly stop at that spot and make a loud crunching noise? I also imagine that other people jump off next to me and I grab them and hold their arm all the way until the top of the hill, where they discover my shoulder is dislocated so they send the emergency people for me and I am a big hero. An even more far fetched fantasy is that a little child on the chair behind me slips and is dangeling there, hanging by one arm. I kick off my skis, climb the chair onto the cable that all the chairs are attached to, climb along it to their chair, climb down, and pull the kid back up to safety. This will never happen of course because there are not very small children riding chair lifts by themselves and it would be a miracle if I even managed to climb up to the cable, and I would never be able to lift a small child with just one arm.
November 10, 2008 10:18 PM
kadyhexum said...
Hanna do you think about this while on the chairlift, or while laying in your bed?p.s. I need to add that I also have a fear that I will stick my tongue on frozen metal outside. Even though I know I'm not supposed to do it, I'm afraid I will.
November 11, 2008 10:27 AM
mom said...
Nuts....you're all nuts.
November 18, 2008 9:35 AM
7 comments:
kasey said...
I'm sorry, but I feel this fear of gravity stopping is completely legit. At least I am not afraid of balloons, like my sister in law Shene, ridiculous.
November 2, 2008 12:15 PM
Kelly said...
I gave the fear of losing gravity to Kasey, Sorry its one of my biggest. I actually hope that when it happens, I'm in my home, so that I don't float away into space. Another fear: while skiing I fear that I will just randomly jump off the lift. Sometimes I wrap my arm around the back of seat, just in case it happens.
November 5, 2008 1:57 PM
Kim said...
Your rational self won't stop you from just jumping off the lift? You'll just happen to be over some wide open space, and you'll think to yourself, hmmmm, I think I'll jump! ??
November 5, 2008 4:56 PM
kadyhexum said...
Sometimes I have a fear that while driving down the highway at breakneck speeds, I will purposely drive into a tree. I have to stop myself from doing it.Or in a plane I fear that I might try to break the window near my seat.
November 6, 2008 10:28 AM
Hanna said...
I think the jumping off a ski lift thing is rational. I have the same thing. Most of the way up I just imagine what would happen when I hit the ground, would I land perfectly and ski all the way down the hill backwards? Or would I land and instantly stop at that spot and make a loud crunching noise? I also imagine that other people jump off next to me and I grab them and hold their arm all the way until the top of the hill, where they discover my shoulder is dislocated so they send the emergency people for me and I am a big hero. An even more far fetched fantasy is that a little child on the chair behind me slips and is dangeling there, hanging by one arm. I kick off my skis, climb the chair onto the cable that all the chairs are attached to, climb along it to their chair, climb down, and pull the kid back up to safety. This will never happen of course because there are not very small children riding chair lifts by themselves and it would be a miracle if I even managed to climb up to the cable, and I would never be able to lift a small child with just one arm.
November 10, 2008 10:18 PM
kadyhexum said...
Hanna do you think about this while on the chairlift, or while laying in your bed?p.s. I need to add that I also have a fear that I will stick my tongue on frozen metal outside. Even though I know I'm not supposed to do it, I'm afraid I will.
November 11, 2008 10:27 AM
mom said...
Nuts....you're all nuts.
November 18, 2008 9:35 AM
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